with Clint Panzerdivision
28/08/05
Has it really been three months since the last Fracas? My goodness, doesn't time fly, eh? I hope you've all
had a lovely summer. Me? Oh, pretty quiet - I spent a few days in Amsterdam earlier in the month though.
Yes, it's a beautiful city, and really jolly liberal.
Football? Why of course! That's what I'm here for, after all. I'm glad you mentioned it, actually, since I'm
pretty certain I took the trouble to take a few notes on a game. Bear with me, they're here somewhere. Ah
"Some fucking football game on the telly. Blues versus whites. Blues scored a goal."
I think that neatly summarises the cut and thrust start to the new season.
Did you know that although the robin is a protected bird, you can legally kill one if it's endangering your life? I
Oh all right, I'll do it. God. Here's some sport.
Well, it's all transfers at the moment, on account of it's the start of the season, as mentioned previously. I know about this from ISS Pro Evolution Soccer - there's some sort of transfer deadline or something. Anyway, since writing down a list of names I don't recognise next to a list of clubs I don't care about holds the same sort of appeal as a temp job in data inputting, you may want to take a look at this site:
I warn you though, don't be fooled by the word "gossip" in that website address, it may lead you to believe you're going to read something interesting, when in fact you're going to discover that "Blackburn are keen on signing Stoke right-back John Halls". Still, it's your time, who am I to tell you what to do with it?
Top footballing headline this week belongs to our old friend Asier del Horno. He's now back from his bootlegging exploits in Chicago with Jennifer Aniston and Ed Norton, and scoring goals for Chelsea. What an exciting life that crazy bastard must lead, eh? Man, I wish I was del Horno. Then I'd be rich, and he'd be me. He could do the washing up, that'd save me a job.
The early games of the season appear to have been most interesting in Scotland, where I note that
several teams have won (and by consequence other teams lost) three-nil, which is an unusually high goal
difference within the game of footballing. Actually it's a constant surprise to me that goals aren't scored
more often. You'd think that with all the training they do, some of the players would have a fairly decent
aim, but no, time and time again there they are, hoofing it over the net or belting it past the wrong side of
the post. Fair enough, I couldn't do it for love nor money, but hey, that's not my job. It's yours,
footballers. Now sort it out.
Off the subject for a second, regular readers may be wondering whether the domain name www.cornishpasty.net is still for sale. Current information suggests that the site is owned by a client of Tripod UK Ltd, and is under construction, though Simon might be the client. I could check, but I think he'd think I was taking the piss. Anyway, just thought I'd mention. In case, you know, you were wondering.
Oh, here's a good one. The cup final. There must have been some sort of cup final over the summer, right? Or some sort of UEFA thing? There's always something like that, surely. Hang on a sec.
There's the World Cup in 2006, but I couldn't find anything else. It seems that England got quite badly thrashed
by Denmark recently though, which I expect came as a bit of a blow. Can't quite work out from the article
whether it was a World Cup qualifier or not, but I think not. They wouldn't have two qualifiers against the same
team, would they? Whatever. There's another qualifier, or the actual qualifier in September. Best play better,
hey? C'mon England, let's stuff those dirty Denkos!
Splundig vur Thrigg, Earthlets,
- Clint.
Clint Panzerdivision will be appearing regularly, and often drunkenly, on Sky's Soccer AM show throughout the season.
